Saturday, May 22, 2010

It is almost over

Well, the road to my MBA is winding down. I am less than 3 hours away from taking my final exam. Fifty questions in an hour and fifteen - yes the road is winding down and I am once again conflicted.

I am thrilled I will be done and I will have the degree under my belt - but all the time and energy I have put into the process will come to a halt and I will need to re-focus my energies. While I've looked forward to not being saddled - it was also a great escape. I could hole myself up and ask for quiet. I could stay up late, get inside my head and work. All the things I hated while at the same time - I enjoyed.

So - it comes down to this final - and I'm not wanting to push the sprint - only want to pause and relish the finish line - if I drag it out long enough I can avoid my responsiblities of the day and when I wake up tomorrow - I will be done. I will be in church thanking God for everything He has granted and I will be able to sit back and breathe a sigh of relief.

What I am blessed with is the fact we will have company on Monday so I will be able to re-focus energies toward cleaning the house - trouble is - I won't have the excuse of having to study to use to step away from the chores.

See how emotional this is?

So - I have decided my study time will now become physical fitness time - I will spend more time and energy on running, walking, biking and swimming. I will become focused upon my task of becoming more physically fit for my new job. I will become focused upon my task of learning a the Sailors Creed and the General Orders. I will focus upon becoming a mom and doing all the things I've missed out because of school. I will focus upon being a better friend and keeping the dates and promises I make.

I cannot believe this is the end. I cannot believe I have two Masters degrees. Yeah. I cannot beleive it is almost over.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

The world of online dating

Wow. Someone just left here after showing me the world of online dating and I gotta say - I'm a bit jealous and creeped out at the same time. I know that sounds terrible about being jealous as I am happily married - but I can say I didn't date a whole lot for various reasons. I pretty much was told at one point that I "scare men." Which is something that a single gal never really wanted to hear - but it was good enough for me. So - I scared men. But obviously I didn't scare the one I've been married to for the past 13 years.

Regardless - let me get to the point - I thought it was cool this gal could go online and see how many "winks" and profile looks she got - that would be a total ego boost I'd think and it made me wonder if I would get any winks or looks and if I would be "matched" with Dan via the online match finder. Then I began developing different things aside from winks - like can you butt grab or have em talk to the hand....seems a wink is just too boring!

So - we are sitting at the dining room table looking at this website and wow - are these guys dumb or what?!

One guy - his profile picture had a woman cut out of the shot - but her hands were still draped around his neck. Hello?? Anyone home? That is the only picture you had to put online - a picture of your face with another woman's arms around you? Either you have a ton of gal pals, you are hating the gal you just broke up with OR you are just stupid. Then the other dude taking his own picture. I said "red flag" right there - the guy didn't have any friends to take a nice picture of him? He has to take the picture of himself? I know it was a personal portrait because it has his arm extended out and that funny angle you get when you shoot your own mug. It would seem if her were a catch he'd have his friends covering his back - getting cool pics now and again.

Then the spelling - is spell check unavailable? Goodness - if you are trying to show someone how brilliant you are - why in the hell can't you spell? It wasn't just one word - it was a handful of words. Lazy I'd say - that would be a clear strike.

So we are scrolling through and I say " Oh hey - let's take a look at him - he's cute" But we can't because if you click on a profile they can see who looked at them - and then they can stalk you back. Good lord - what fun is that?

Then I also got to thinking about the number of people out there in this world just waiting to meet their special someone and are still waiting for someone to click on their profile. I see it like fishing - drop in the line and see who bites - but then those guys that are a bit shy or not so confident or those who cannot hide behind a wall of humor - may continue to miss out because they just don't stand out. It seemed a bit like high school - picking guys out based upon their look. Then a bit like college when you try to determine the amount of substance and maturity and then like old, hardened souls - knowing a guy that has to put "faithful" in his post is just trying to convince himself.

We talk about innovation a lot in business school - if I were innovative - I would write online profiles for a living because some of these guys profiles just suck.

So - this is where the relief sets in - I have a stable, happy marriage with a man I adore and I don't have to put myself out there - I know I am loved with all my flaws - with the fact I schlep around the house in sweats, that I snore at times, I sleep talk and laugh, I make cereal for dinner and keep house like my paternal grandmother. I don't have to log into a computer every night and wade through the bullshit to get to the meat. I am relieved I am grounded but still a bit curious...what kind of online profile would I have?

Just a thought you know....just a thought.