What is it with families? Some are close, others are not. Some enjoy being together all the time, others never talk. Some families take vacations together, others can't even be in the same room. I think mine is somewhere in the middle.
My mother believes she can say what ever she feels, regardless of how it will be received. Yet, when the favor is returned, she gets upset. It has been revealed I hold more respect for my friends than I do my own family. Yet, I have never had friends tell me I'm fat, that I'm a low life in need of attention or that they don't like my husband.
My close friends on the other hand call me up and want to go for a walk...to Rocky's for ice cream. I have friends who send cute cards and offer words of kindness - how friendship with me is valuable. My friends embrace my husband and we enjoy the times we all go out together. Why is it I can be me with them and not with my family?
I should expect that my folks embrace me for who and what I am. Apparently I'm seen as selfish, uncaring, ungiving, negative, and judgemental ...then again...this coming from the f0lks who call me fat and a low life.
So it puts me in a place where I really don't want to be. I don't want to spend time with the family because I do not appreciate how I feel when I'm with them. I would rather spend time with those who see me and accept me for who I am.
I don't want this post to be about dirty laundry. I do want this post to be like a buoy...a reminder that there are objects ahead...that when approaching, use caution, take the time, make the right moves....
While I've decided to put on my life jacket in case of a wreck - others in this world may want to move with caution as they navigate the rough "family" waters. For me, I'm tired of always sitting down when I'm told. This time I gonna stand up when the boat rocks and try to make sure I don't get sea sick.
I'll let you know how it turns out.
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