24

I love Jack Bauer. I love him. I love how he is conflicted, how he can love and let go, how he is loyal in the face of uncertainty. I love his style and the fact he can get out of any situation. I love his ability to be aware of his environment. I simply love Jack.

I hate that I have to wait until next week to find out what happens.

What amazes me about the show, is each and every week I know I'll be left hanging - and each and every week I get up after the hour is up and say "I hate this show."

It is also a show where my intensity level elevates and I find myself unable to relax for a few hours after - not sure why I get so caught up, mentally and physically - but I think it is the thought that some of this "Hollywood" isn't so off base. While Jack Bauer is all Hollywood, the situations are all in a realm of reality - and maybe that is what is frightening to me - to live in a world where greed and power are so pervasive. Makes me think. A Lot.

I start to think about those we've elected to office - how it is their own best interest they serve and not ours. While there are those that may go in young and fresh, full of ideals and passion - it is left behind somewhere. I often wonder about the reflection pool near the US Capitol - do you ever think it was put there for our leaders to look into and see if they like the reflection staring back?

I am conflicted these days - in many things - my passions, my desires, my goals, my faith, my government. I think government is operating in places it should not be - meddling and stirring the pot - why just the other day I saw something on the news that indicated an apartment complex made it illegal for people to smoke in their rented apartments. What is that?! Who elected these people? While I gave up smoking years ago and thankful I quit, I still think it is a right for people to smoke....for it is within the law. So we have government that tells us how to live, how to work, how to be healthy, how to be educated....but it cannot follow its own rules.

Without laws we would have no order. I realize that point and I'm not suggesting we go rogue and break the law as we see fit - but I do think we have a responsibility to become vocal and have some input on the law. I do feel we have a duty to serve in our homes and in our communities. I do feel we are not above the law, but nor are we to be held down by it. I think that is ultimately what I love about Jack Bauer.

Until next week...I'll be watching full episodes online.....

Observations

Well - Christmas day is past and so is the New Year but it is the observations of those past few weeks that has me really wondering how we are raising our children. The idea of waiting, and saving for things must be considered so outdated it is no wonder why we are having financial bailouts left and right.

At one event I overheard a mom, as she played with her Blackberry, how her children would constantly fight over the laptop computer in their home. Her solution was simply to go out and buy another one. Now it is peace and quiet and mom doesn't have to listen to the fight. Um. Did I miss something here? I simply shake my head and consider the actions of the adults and then I can understand why our youth do not have a clue. In our house, we have multiple computers and it has nothing to do with sharing issues or solving a fight and our children are not allowed to play on the computer. In our home, the computer is a tool - it is a tool for work and school. Granted I do allow the children an occasional navigational field trip to check explore Webkinz or Club Penguin but those moments are few and far between.

If I heard my kids fighting over the computer they would no longer have access. A fight over a computer is unacceptable - just as a fight over most things is. For fighting over items is irresponsible and we teach our children as such. Yeah - I have perfect kids - they do not fight over things - they fight with each other....that is for another blog on another day.

So. We have the woman that buys her kids a new laptop for fighting. Then we have the young girl who walked up to someone, and I'm thinking it was a relative because the word Aunt was used and demanded her Christmas gift. Outright said "Hey, Aunt So and So. Where is my gift." It was not said sweetly with kisses and sugar - it was more like swoop in and take and when there was no gift it was "You gave so and so theirs. I want mine." Hello? Has the meaning of the word "gift" been redefined? Nothing was said to the young girl - not by the Aunt or the parents nearby. I only shake my head in disappointment our youth are so comfortable demanding from their elders.

I see greed and waste everywhere and I think to myself "are we accustomed to so much we cannot see the value in what we have?" It is sad that we cannot look deeper and reconnect with ourselves, our children and our families and find the true motivation for our existence. We are all here for a purpose - not just to take - we must give back.

For the mom who uses things to solve the issues of parenting - I hope you have a ton of money in the bank - because buying things to make your kids stop fighting will never work. Put down your Blackberry and forget about your personal life. Look at your children and help them discover who they are and show them how fortunate they are. Go camping where you having nothing but the clothes on your back - reconnect.

For the young gal who demanded a gift. What have you done for your mom or dad? What have you done for your Aunt? Give of yourself and maybe it will be a whole lot easier for Auntie to reward your efforts.

I don't want to give up on people - as I think there is much we are able to do. I also don't have to look far to see the good works of people right here in my community. Works of those that really understand there is something greater than themselves. If you want to be inspired - check out one of my new favorite blog, Jesus on the Street.

Welcome to the new year - where we make resolutions to better ourselves. If we can better ourselves, we can better our communities.

Shoes and Senate Seats

Ok. It has been quite a while since I've posted and it is not because I have a lack of things that are on my mind - just a lack of quality time to post! So, now - with the snow piling up outside and the kids occupied with friends I have a moment to write...about shoes and senate seats.

First - the shoe thrower in Iraq. The first I saw of this was from my Google home page feed and I clicked onto a video link showing our President ducking a shoe. The first thing I did was laugh. Not because I thought the event was funny - but because of the look on our President's face. Shoes hurling through the air and he skillfully ducked. I was impressed - as I play the Wii Fit and I can't duck soccer shoes hurling through the air. Makes me wonder if President Bush has a Wii in his office.

So - the man who threw the shoes. Is he a horrible person - should he be jailed for this offense? Ultimately, he missed and did he intend on hitting the President? My thought is he only was expressing his dissatisfaction. If I took my shoe and threw it at a public official what would the crime be? I'm thinking I'd be guilty of assault as I threw the shoe, it did not touch the official but the intent was there. Assault. So charge the man with assault and have it be done with. Let President Bush pardon the man - forgive him for expressing his anger. The man has every right to express himself - just not in the manner he chose. Yet, I'm thankful the man that hurled his shoes did so - as it demonstrates people are now feeling as if they can express themselves. Fantastic. We all have our emotions and feelings and for the first time in years - people in Iraq are getting comfortable expressing themselves.

Now - onto Senate seats. Selling them to the highest bidder? What is with our elected officials? How on earth do we as a people keep putting these people in office? Good Lord - I've really had enough! As a graduate of a public administration program I understand the need for people to publicly serve. I see the need for individuals to step up and make this country great. I see the need for people to take on the public office setting without violating ethics and I'm wondering what is so difficult about the process. From affairs to scandals - how do these men and women in office have time to screw us and each other? Which leads me to the fact it is not the job...it is the power that causes the problem. Stan Lee said it best "With great power comes great responsibility." I only wish our politicians could take a look in the mirror and find the true meaning of service and perform the duty unconditionally.

Friendship, Raccoons and other stuff

Last weekend I had the opportunity to finally participate in the Detroit Half Marathon with a friend. Lord knows I've tried to get people to head to the "east side" with me in the past but I've always gone....alone. Not that alone is bad - why it was quite a fun experience - I could run when I wanted, walk when I wanted, chat up a stranger and enjoy the time - alone in my head. But this year was different...and fun!

It was comforting to have a friend walk down a dark sidewalk in the early morning hours. I was comforting to have a friend willing to go the distance, without great hair or make up. I was with my friend and it felt good. When we started the half, we were behind the full marathoners and just in front of the half runners - crazy when we came together and headed to the Ambassador Bridge - like a pack of rats running from a flood - weaving in and out trying to find the idea spot to settle into for the long haul. Then the sun came up. Light pinks and orange graced the sky and even though we were running on the industrial side of the river - it was somehow peaceful and disconcerting at the same time. There were many times I glanced at the Ren Cen with its GM logo and I only could wonder what would become of the American automotive industry. Detroit had a heyday and I only wonder why, with its amazing frontage on the water, why it is less than a desirable place to be. Can the city turn? Can the city overcome its reputation?

Why, at dinner the night before, a young gal was eating with us and explained cars get stolen and broken into all the time where she lives. Another young woman confessed her car got stolen at least once a year. Prostitutes roam the streets looking for action - where there seems to be none. It is terribly sad but inspiring at the same time - because some day...Detroit will be the place to 'Be.' If I had the money, I'd buy a place on Woodward or even in Corktown - I suppose I would, if I didn't have a family. What does having a family have to do with it? Well - I suppose I could say I have a responsibility to offer them the best environment I can to nurture them and well - Detroit just isn't it.

So - I'm on the bridge, trying to get Tammy to stop for pictures and she doesn't want to stop - she is driven to make the goal of making the tunnel and not getting on the bus - but I could also tell - she wasn't having a grand time. Friendship. She kept going because she didn't want to disappoint me and I kept slowing down because I didn't want to disappoint her. We promised each other we would stick together and finish together and while I am so competitive and it was hard to do - I kept with my word. Our friendship is more important - and once I came to terms with it - I was ok. I enjoy Tammy and our friendship. We are so different and yet, so much the same.

If you ever want to know what true friendship is - complete a marathon with a friend.

Now. Raccoons. Are they dumb or slow or are there just too many of them? Really - I don't know what it is but I see raccoon roadkill everywhere. I'm not sure if it was on my way to Indiana two weekends ago or driving to Detroit that it struck me funny. Some were fresh - others looked as if they could explode any moment, some - only recognizable because of their tails - but I couldn't get over how many of them were dead. I don't know why I thought it funny - because it really isn't.

Other stuff. We had a parish mission last week and I didn't really understand how a mission works - so I showed up on the last day. Well , it seems every day before builds on the last and this session was sort of a Q & A. The topic of politics came up and who we should vote for - and the recommendation was made to vote for the candidate that falls in line with the moral teachings of the church. Well I struggle with the recommendation and feel that is sort of calling for a blind following - but that is another issue. What did come up that I find right on is the fact the church has abdicated its responsibility to taking care of the hungry, homeless and outcast. As a church - it has let the government take care of the issues and we all know how that is working out.

We pay a lot in taxes to run inefficient programs. We pay a lot of taxes to take care of people - who quite frankly, if given the right tools - could take care of themselves. What has happened? The church is a nonprofit but why? What is it they do for us and our communities? They take money and pass it out to other non-profits in the area - supporting other programs and services. The church is a middle man. Why? There was also a call to have "family" time be more in the areas of service - which I agree. I believe my children have such an advantaged lifestyle they are unable to see the value of what they have. Should I blame them? We are in a community full of wealth - kids walking around with iPhones, iPods, Lucky Brand jeans, Nintendo DS - you name it - they have it and chances are not just one. But what if, what if, we all took the time to put our gadgets down and actually serve?

I took that suggestion to heart and when notified of an opportuntiy that welcomed children (which is another thing I have issues with the Church - children are not welcome to help at many events) I jumped at the chance. My children will be working in a food kitchen next Tuesday night - four hours - serving those who are hungry and in need of a warm place to come together. I hope they learn from the experience - having a variety of food on the table is a luxury - as many nights I hear the chorus "I don't like this...." - I threaten going back to a week of nothing but rice and it seems to work - but hopefully this will be an eye opening experience.

So - here is to friendship, dead animals and serving the community - while there doesn't seem to be a common theme - I think there is.....hope -love and sacrifice.

Skimming

Skimming - it is fun. It is fun to read quickly through something, but it never works for me because then when I'm finished I wonder what I REALLY missed.

For example, a few days ago I was in a waiting room and I picked up a magazine, I think a Newsweek or something because it had a picture of Sarah Palin on the front - headline of something like "Pa lin tology" - she had a hunting rifle over her shoulder with that really flashy smile. So I picked it up - wanted to see what the article was about. (Obviously about Sarah, but I never got that far). So in true Jenny fashion I started from the back of the magazine.

As I was flipping backwards, I ran across an article on Afghanastan and the number of kidnappings in recent months - how the Taliban members are raking in a fortune by kidnapping foreign contractors (as opposed to killing them outright) and asking for ransom. Apparently, they are getting the money so they keep kidnapping. Trouble is - different factions are not reporting thier kidnapping incomes so the No. 2 guy in charge - issued a new handbook.

I find this - while distrubing - extrememly funny at the same time. Has SNL done a skit on this yet? My goodness! The humor comes in the notion that once kidnapping became a source of income for many individuals the leadership takes an interest and wants to make sure they get thier "cut" therefore sending out a new handbook of rules to follow. Wow. I can see it now.

It seems a bit like multi-level marketing doesn't it? The handbook is this really shiny, slick looking piece - has a picture of smiling faces, in front of luxury cars saying "This could be you!"
The idea here is to recruit members - they pay lets say $100.00 for a starter kit (this could be rope, tape, blindfolds) and a territory to cover. For every kidnapping someone pulls of and completes (meaning they get the ransom) they get 30 percent of the total while the upline gets money as well. Don't follow the kidnapping handbook and you lose your ability to do business.

Pretty soon, they could do house parties - showcasing the person they've kidnapped - pretty soon there will be ethical violations, the Taliban will be putting ads on Craigslist, "Want to be a an actor?" "You can be an actor and get paid $50.00 for your role in pretending to be a kidnapping victim. You must have a family or business that would be willing to pay to get you back and based upon your net worth, we may consider paying a bonus. You must be willing to travel alone , must be wiling to work long hours without food or sleep. Please send two photographs and $10.00 in a SASE in order to process an application. Not all applicatants will be accepted. No phone calls."

While this post is so "off" - but so is the kidnapping handbook. Do you think Al Capone had a handbook? I think he was able to exert his influnence without having a manual...

So, back to the aspect of skimming - I missed the Palin article altogether. I only read up to the handbook part of the Taliban article, and saw an artist rendering of a cancer cell before I closed the magazine and put it back on the shelf.

Smells

Smells. They are simply amazing and I wonder how different the world would be without them. Such an odd thought don't you think? But I only bring it up because the other day a particular smell brought back a flood of memories.

I used to be a swimmer. I learned to swim when I was about eight or nine. Sort of old for my age but I really hated the water as a small child. Not sure why - but I just didn't like it. I remember my mom throwing me in a swimming pool (I had a life jacket on) at a birthday party - I had to have been five or so and when I was tossed in the jacket pulled above my head and I couldn't see anything around me but orange - my legs kicking - arms flailing and my voice screaming. I don't know if I was screaming because I was angry about being thrown in, or scared of being in the water. Yet, it isn't this part of the story that matters...it is the fact that from the age of nine to seventeen I spent the majority of my free time swimming competitively.

I enjoyed it and for the life of me I'm not sure why. But for those eight years I spent a lot of time and hours in the pool - fall, winter, spring and summer. Chlorine is a smell in and of itself - not a very friendly smell or one that you want to bottle and sell - but it is a smell - a faintness of it on a swim suit or wet towel that makes me remember some of the best times.

I loved my first competitive swim team - it was one for the Rockford Community Ed. I think they are called the Riptide now - but I remember Chris Ingrahm, and Bill Kemp some of my first coaches. I remember my first competitive swim suit - it was red with white strips - I remember my first DQ, the stuffed Ram on the 3m diving board. I remember sharks and minnows and swimming on Valentines Day holding hands for a sweetheart swim with Mike Westgate (he probably would never remember - but it stuck in my head).

I remember dry land and weight lifting - Jenny Moore hitting her chin on the bottom of the pool and being nicknamed "Chin Strap" for the rest of her community ed career. I remember my first relay team Anna, Katrina, Ashley and me. We formed friendships and community and some of my best memories were from the times I swam.

I remember drinking chocolate shakes at the Old Mill in Rockford and getting my best times and thinking I had to have a chocolate shake each and every time....2:16 in the 200 free - it was my personal best as a 10 or 11 year old.

I remember thinking I wanted to be a part of the Monster Squad - and working my rear end off to be a part of Spyke Johnson's crew - never really made the offical "sqad" but put in the work to be a 'thunderbird' - 5:30 swims before school and the 5:00-7:00 swims after. I remember Reggie Thomas and his sign language - Raider swim camps and Dick Koperski. I remember earning my Varisty letter as a freshman and being the only freshman to place in city finals.


So the other day, when I decided to get back in the pool and swim laps (which has been at least 9 years) I swam at the pool I first began my swimming career. The diving boards are gone and the starting blocks are at the deep end now (probably because Jenny Moore wasn't the only one that hit the bottom). I began thinking a ton of thoughts: how boring is this, why did I ever like this, how did I ever make friends, I think I liked this because I never felt sweat drip down my face or back, I wonder how far I can swim, I wonder what happened to Chris and Bill...and then before I knew it - time was up. I had to get out.

Yet, after I was dressed and leaving the locker room, and heading out the door - I had the "smell" the crisp air smell - the smell I remember so many years ago and I knew - I've missed that smell. I felt good. I felt happy and I knew I couldn't wait to get back in the pool.

The smell of crisp air. It was amazing.

Oh those emails!

I received an email from a friend of mine this morning. The email was written as sort of a "heads up" about giving to nonprofit foundations that support other organizations that may not be in line with ones "moral compass." While I appreciate where she was headed with the email - I am looking to the potential damage it can do. Let me explain.

Right now I'm enrolled in an MBA program. I have Business Economics (I could go on and on in another post) and what I've gotten thus far is this....economics is all about trade offs. By choosing one aspect over another there are certain costs and sometimes choices are made withouth thinking about the secondary effects.

The email was sent to raise awareness about the misuse of funds. A particluar foundation gave money in support of a cancer program the grant seeking organization never enacted. Instead, the funds were thought to support another program, specifically abortion. So the idea behind the email was to "inform" me, before I decided to support the unnamed foundation via a walk/run etc. I should be aware what I "think" I'm raising funds for...I'm not.

So I took it upon myself to check out Guidestar and the Form 990. What I discovered is this Foundation spends hundreds and thousands of dollars supporting other organizations that do exactly what they are supposed to do with the monies! Pages upon pages list Universities and University Medical Centers - all of which are the hubs of brilliant minds that may one day develop a cure for cancer.

So, back to the email that was sent - encouraging me "not" to support the Foundation because it supports an organization that supports pro abortion. Yet, the Foundation is impacting and making real strides in supporting education, awareness and research of cancer (pro life? If I try to develop a cure for something that kills people...is that pro-life too?). Consider for a moment I forward this particular email to everyone I know and individuals decide to withhold their donations on the grounds one specific organization misused funds. We must ask ourvselves...what are the potential "side effects?"

There was no mention of the fact the Foundation has not made an recent contributions to this organization as well....as far as I'm concerned it is old news.

What I struggle with is the idea of being short-sighted. Stop giving - without considering the amount of good. I guess it goes back to the other book I started to read (and never finished) called "The Paradox of Choice" - we can ask ten people what they think about a paricular automobile and have ten favorable reviews, yet once one person indicates they've had trouble with that particular auto - we can't let it go. We most often, will take the 1 negative over the 10 positives and make that negative influence our decision.

Do I let 72 grants made over 5 years to an organization that supports abortion influence my opportunity to support an foundation that has given thousands of grants over 15 (or even more) years to organizations that truly value quality of life? I guess I have to weigh the costs...and I don't have to think very hard.